So, today was the first day of Addy's dance class. First of all I thought I signed her up for a fun recreational class that would last for eight weeks. Oh no, I signed her up for a full year apparently with a production at the end!! oh my...
Anyways, second stage of clueless mom part two..I didn't have my child decked to the nines in dance attire that would put me back a fine penny..woops..
So again, feeling like a moron. And than the class begins..oh wait, mom, you can convince your two year old to go in a class by herself with strangers while you stay outside..awesome...so I sat in my dress at the door smashed up so other moms could take pictures as my child ran back and forth to me completely clueless to what was going on. She seemed happy as she got to run around and there was music going..but than I looked to see that all the other little girls were listening to the teacher somewhat following her as they helped hands in the circle and did the hokey pokey..while my kid..well...she was dancing by herself in the mirror:) And of course running back and forth to give me multiple kisses:) So I am sitting there feeling like a smuck. My kids that kid, the odd one out, the free spirit in her own happy world, but the odd one out. And than the environment caught up with her, after I kept telling her she needed to stay in the room, and than the tears came:( and than the took her ribbon away and it was game over...
So needless to say, this hormonal mom who is completely clueless and has no clue what she is doing was overwhelmed, frustrated and wanting to cry with my baby girl. We will try again next week, but I am just not sure. I am not sure if my kids going to be one of these obliging cooperative kids, or the one who just wants to do her thing..she is two..and that's what I feel, but when you are spinning looking around at whats going on and feel completely out of place and like you are the odd man out, well, you panic. But what my head has been spinning about all day is I parented re-actively, but now I am trying to decide how I want to parent this situation. Do I just let her do what she wants to do, run in and out and see what happens..just go with it, until the teacher tells me otherwise, or do I tough love her and make her stick it out and keeping pushing her to stay in the class even if ends up in tears??? I don't know! I am trying to find this balance between not being a toddlers and tiara's mom, as that is NOT my style at all, but at the same time I don't want my kid to try new things, or be afraid, or give up...but is two too young to expect any of this???? again, I am so torn today, and the learning curves, with the lack of sleep don't make for a sane mama:)
What I do know is this...I stinkin love my kid, and think she is the coolest little person and the world, as much as I feel the social pressures, I want to rise above it and let me kid be who God made her to be:) That much I know to be true..the rest, well I guess one day I will figure it out:)
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