December first...tomorrow...really??

Well its almost here...the big C that is, meaning Christmas, not the tv show;) Which I am curious to watch by the way...ok, anyways, back onto my topic:) Tomorrow is December first and I think I am still a bit in shock over that. As usual time is flying! Things are starting to feel a little settled around here..in some aspects. I am still in the new stages of my new promotion at work, but feeling more settled in it now because now that I have moved up a step my schedule is more routine, and not so much all over the place. I have gone to three maybe four days a week, and full days instead of this five days a week, 4-7 hour long shifts. And no sundays!!
It was way too much..it was killing me emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually. I definetly wasn't finding a good balance in my life, and I don't function well when my life is out of balance! Anyone else out there that can relate? so yes this 24 hours a week or so is managable, still not ideal, as ideal would be full time at home with my girl; but managable. I know financially i should work more, but its just so not worth it!! and that is a great feeling to know. So basically my priorities are figured out in my heart, and I know God is going to bless my family for that. And even this week things seem more encouraging.
The one poopy part of this last while has been the illness in this house. Due to shift work, going back to work, and life stress I have had a cold for the past three months it feels like. Off and on it keeps coming back and I just can't seem to feel better. And this week my poor little girl got it:( Its been rough, with the multiple wake ups in the middle of the night, and the sick little girl who is not too happy right now..but I believe the antibiotics are starting to kick in and I am hopeful for a better day tomorrow for both of us!
I have also been getting back into my devotions and that has been helping me a lot..what a concept right??!
Another big step for me this week was to start doing something for myself. With having to work a job I don't love, and that is just a job, my heart has been aching. Aching for meaning, purpose, and a plan. So I have finally put into action something that has been on my heart for really, 15 years, but more directly in the past three. I always thought I wanted to be a nurse, a neo natal one to be exact..I love babies!! its true:) But every time i would start out my schooling down that path it just wouldn't work out. I have tried three times now; no joke! well, while I was pregnant with Addyson it started to dawn on me what I wanted to do. I wanted/needed to be in some sort of health care, helper role but I just hadn't figured out what that looks like yet. My dream, if I had the money, and a school closer to me would be to become a midwife. I wouldn't do it with little ones, but once they are all grown up I would be all over it. So than I started researching the Doula program, and realized, hey, this is something tangible that I can do. It got pushed to the back burner, but has started to creep up again this last while. So I decided last week to just go for it. I ordered my first set of books and I am on my way to reading this fantastic material. I have decided for now I want to pursue the post partum Doula program as I don't think it would be smart for me to try and balance, 3am deliveries with my own little ones, but the post partum one is feesable. The other thing I have decided is that i am doing this for myself. Meaning, if Never make a dime off of it I don't care I am doing this for me, and that feels good! I think the post partum thing spoke to me as I know what it is like to adjust in those first couple of weeks under unexcted circumstance, due to a c-section in my circumstances, but I have dear friends who have walked much darker paths than me, and I just want to help, be a light, use it as a ministry, whatever God wants from it, its his...so that is exciting to me, and it feels good to get excited! anyways, just needed to write down my life update for myself, and will be back for some christmas things to look forward to, and some recipes! be blessed my blogger friends!

what I am thankful for.

Even though its not Canadian thanksgiving today, even though part of me wishes it was..I felt the need to write a gratitude list. I like the word gratitude/grateful, to me it just has that much more depth and meaning than thankful..so I use it...With the stressors of life weighing heavily on my heart some days i felt the need to focus on the good, because there is a lot of that, but I have this horrible character trait that allows worry and fear to comsume my need for faith and trust in my FATHER...its a daily battle a daily laying at the cross..but love conquers all, and he is love...

so here is my list for today...cause I am trying to take things one day at a time;)

-My girl, I looked over at her face today as she watched her praise baby, captivated by the music; she captivates my heart..I am eternally grateful for her in my life.
-My hubby. He's such a good man who loves his girls dearly and we love him for that;)
-Furnaces:) baby its cold outside! so I am so grateful to have a day off today to be tucked inside my warm cozy home its lovely!
-Snow falls, and not having to go outside and drive in said snowfall.
-hot beve's:) warm water with honey(I know I am a granny but with this cold that just wont go away it feels so good), hot coffee...so good...
-comfort food! cause that is what we are having for dinner!
-leggings! I finally got a pair, and I am in love!!
-time for devotions. I have been plugging back in and it feels so good to be doing so. I know my obedience will pay off in so many ways. because the word is so nourishing for the soul.
-muffins..I just made a batch and they are delish!
-Grace...I am so grateful for the grace that is constantly shown in my life...

halloween 2010

This year Addyson was our little dalmation; and in my opinion the cutest one around! She loved being in her little costume and as you can see checking herself out in the mirror! Addy's cousin came over to join us, and her parents too, as we toured our neighborhood on this new adventure of trick or treating. Addy did great and seemed to quite like this idea of going door to door to get things! After a few houses in our area we headed to my parents, than Dave's parents and back home for some late night nacho's with the cousins! it was a fun night! still feels surreal at times that we are doing this, but still fun:)

life update

What a beautiful month October has been but it is official, the rain is here! But that is ok with me. As long as it doesn't go on forever! It does give us a good excuse to curl up inside and not feel guilty about not being out in the sun!

These last three months have definetely been crazy for our little family. Lots of adjusting, busyness, pass offs at the door as one comes home from work and the other one heads off, weekends of single parenting, long days, and lots more. But there has been lots of wonderful moments inbetween and we have cherished those. We had a great day at the aquirium back in September for my parents anniversary, a night at Harrison to celebrate my moms birthday, my birthday, our 3rd anniversary, thanksgiving, and last weekend we went to the pumpkin patch. So we have definetely been working on not letting life get ahold of us but us enjoying life when we can! The last big thing we did was this weekend when Dave and I headed downtown for our first night away from Addy. And it was great! We missed our girl but it was easier than I thought and I think that is because we went at a good age and the right time. I only teared up once when I talked to her on sunday morning. We had such a great time though together, eating, lounging, sleeping in, shopping, and just being togther. It felt like us for a moment in time. It was a really good reminder of something I have always really believed in, and that is our marriage; or marriage in general. Meaning, that as important as children and being a parent are, your marriage needs to be on that priority list! And it is so easy to push it to the bottom of the pile under the unfolded laundry. But when you pull it back to the top and take hold of it again, amazing things happen! So, that is what this weekend was, reclaming our marriage, and our bond and love for eachother. And yes, a start of more things to come, as I know more dates are needed in our world!!!
One thing that I know is going to help is that I got promoted to shift supervisor last week and i start training next week:) This is really good news for our family! For a couple of different reasons. First more money, not tons, but right now every bit helps. Second, better hours. Right now I have been workign about 30 hours a week, but 5 days a week, which basically feels like full time anyways. And its not go to work from 9-5 deal with baby for a few hours and than have the nights and weekends off. Its been, toddler all day, go to work at night...ect. So its been a lot! I am not going to lie. Dave has also been working side jobs, so again, we have been like ships passing in the night. But As hard as its been, God continues to be faithful and i choose to continue to stand on his promise that he hasn't left us or forsaken us, and the fruit of that in our life is so apparent. So I am rejoicing today in Gods promises! Because they are so good!

The pumpkin Patch

This last saturday we headed to the pumpkin patch. I was so excited to do this as I had been waiting since last year to go with Addy! I am so glad we went and I think thatAddyson would agree! We went to one called Willow Farms in Abby; free admission, kids toys, petting zoo, pumpkin patch galore, concession stand with country store, it was perfect! We had such a great day as a family and with our friends we went with! Can't wait for next year and making this one of our family traditions!

3 years later

On wed dave and i celebrated three years of marriage. I have to tell you, of all anniversary's this is the first one I woke up and felt excited. I think that it is because I needed to feel excited. I spent our first anniversary sick(morning sickness that is), and our second one we were just both excited and nervous to leave addy for the first time for more than an hour so we could go to dinner and a movie, and by the end of it my boobs felt like they were about to burst.
So there was something fresh and hopeful about this one. A new start i guess? Maybe the feeling that in someway this year feels like it can only get better than last? whatever the reason, it felt good. And I was also so grateful for the day off of work to spend it with my girl. The absolute best things to come out of our first three years together..she has been worth it all.

So after a great day with her and visiting the newest member in our village out here Dave and I got to go out for an amazing Thai dinner and had such a great time just talking..because after three years it feels so natural, so right yet still new and exciting at times.

Marriage is hard..that is for sure, but when you pick the right person, when you listen to Gods directing, when you trust him every step of the way, it can be oh so good.

The funny thing, the irony about it all, is what I have learned is that being married isn't the hard part, its dealing with everyone else;)*grin*

Anyways, Dave, I would choose you all over again, in a heartbeat. But I would go back and tell myself three years ago this:
to let all expectations and set steps go, and just love, just go with the flow, have goals and dreams, but don't let them consume you girl, take each day one day at a time, and focus on the good of that day..and just love...love him...love yourself and keep serving the one that brought you together...because he is the one who is going to bless the next three..thirty...and then some even more than you can imagine. So let go to the father, the one who has the master plan, and just love girl, just love..

My future Picasso

I came home from work the other day to discover this waiting on my counter;) Addyson had spent the day with her Nana(my mom) while I was working and it turns out they unleashed their creative juices. I almost cried when I saw this, because I thought it was the most beautiful thing ever(and yes I understand to someone who is not her mother what it looks like), but, it warmed my heart and made me sad all at the same time! Such a great suprise but I told my mom I was a little sad that I wasn't there to see it:) but that is ok, I know that there is much more painting and drawing and art work to be done in the household, and it makes my heart so happy to know that while I go off to work, my girl is in loving hands;) And doing exactly what I would want to do with her! So yes, I am sure there will be much more artwork on this blog of mine; as I am a proud mama!